Answering The Question: Feelin' Myself (#5)
The difference between recognizing and celebrating your best parts, a reader responds, and some powerful words from James Baldwin.
How are we feeling?
Hopefully, each of you is bursting with joy. Feeling a long-lasting warmth from reflecting on the best parts of yourself.
Realistically, maybe 25% of you had a chance to spend time with this week’s prompt, and even those of you that did have probably lost the perspective of your answer because, well, life gets in the way. I know I’m in that latter group for sure.
So let’s get back to square one. What were we trying to reflect on this week?
How do you celebrate yourself?
Answering the Question: ?????
In processing this question I came to a very distinct realization: there is a difference between recognizing the qualities you honor/celebrate in yourself, and actually being intentional about celebrating and honoring them.
Celebrating yourself first requires recognizing those things you truly admire or are proud of in your identity. From that entry point I was able to brainstorm a list of those things, like:
My resilience
My curiosity about the world and thirst for travel
My loyalty
That I no longer deprive myself and instead honor my indulgences
It felt great to put these things down on paper, to see myself write them. Especially something like the last item on the list, as it’s an item I wouldn’t necessarily think of without having taken the time to reflect on this question.
The list grew to a respectable number of items, at which point I turned to the second half of the issue, the real focus of our prompt this week, figuring out how I go about honoring these elements in my everyday life.
And, uh, well, this says it best.
I couldn’t recognize a single way in my life that I do this. But remember, that’s why we’re on this journey together! I don’t have all the answers, and my hope is that we can learn about how to honor ourselves, together.
So rather than tell you what I learned when exploring this topic this week, I’d like to invite you to join me in the comments to share different ways we can go about honoring/celebrating ourselves in our daily lives. Maybe it’s something you do already, maybe it’s something you aspire to do, or maybe it’s something you’ll find an accountability partner for in our community.
I’ll kick us off by sharing some of the ways I came up with when brainstorming, though the first one is a bit of a low-hanging fruit:
Journaling
Upon reflection, this is one fairly obvious way I celebrate myself. My pages are filled with positive feedback and appreciation for my evolution, but sometimes it can be hard to step back and recognize the role these pages are playing for you.
Accepting compliments
This is one I’m working on. When we don’t accept compliments, thinking we’re seeming humble and down-to-earth, we’re actively denying ourselves positive feedback, something we all deserve. The information we internalize from the world around us should never be all negative! Rather than saying “No, no no,” I’m trying to respond more affirmatively by saying something like, “Thank you so much, I’ve worked hard on that and appreciate you recognizing it.”
Less reluctant language
Celebrating yourself means honoring your beliefs and opinions. It makes me think that striking words and phrases that weaken the delivery of these would be a good way to honor yourself. I’m talking about dropping language like “perhaps” and “this may be crazy, but…” and “I could be wrong…” We could all be wrong, everybody sounds crazy sometimes…but you don’t have to discount yourself out of the gate.
Adding a gratitude component to journaling, specifically related to identity/personality.
So that’s what I came up with. What can you add to the list? Hop in the comments and let me know.
Answering the Question: Our Readers Speak
Have to give a huge shout-out to community member Dakota, who has been sharing his self-discovery journey over on TikTok. He has been publishing weekly video diaries in response to our prompts. Take a look below at his latest, and give him a follow to catch all his entries.
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Something For The Weekend
You may have caught this in last week’s entry, but I’m a huge James Baldwin fan. I’m currently reading my way through The Price of the Ticket with one essay before bed each night and one each morning. I also just finished a re-read of Giovanni’s Room. Thought I’d share some of my favorite passages with you as we head into the weekend. Rather than re-type them, here they are from the man himself.
See you Sunday friends!
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i got caught up in the week and didn't do this earlier this week... and i probably won't get a chance to do it at all this week - which is okay! but i wanted to say that i think the most consistent ways i celebrate myself: exercising for joy, not because of negative feelings about my body. usually journaling. going to therapy. morning affirmations and bringing more of my real self to work.
Another thought on a way to celebrate ourselves: incorporating daily affirmations