The Fifty-Sixth Question: What Could Be Your Motivation?
Getting to the bottom of what propels us towards our goals.
Just back from my first-ever visit to Puerto Rico for a dear friend’s wedding, and after a long day of flying I’m getting this answer in under the radar. Congrats again to the happy couple, Adrian and Edmée!
Answering the Question
I believe I mentioned this in earlier prompts this year, but I’m taking my goals for 2024 in chunks by breaking the year up into quarters. It’s allowing me to focus my energies on specific things at a time (hence why my word for the year is Focus), and to create stronger narratives that will allow me to better remember everything I accomplished this year. For instance, Q1 is now strongly linked with the two major achievements I had set as my goals for that period (running the Los Angeles Marathon and finishing my book proposal), such that I imagine I won’t have trouble recalling them when I try to reflect on 2024 in the future.
One of the other reasons for this is that I noticed my penchant for setting goals to break patterns that I never made any progress at accomplishing. Page after page, I’d journal about wanting to stop X or reduce the frequency of Y, but never take meaningful action towards doing either. A long time horizon and a bounty of goals allowed me to put off the things I needed to do the most. So alongside the hunt for an agent, I’ve given myself three other habit-based objectives to work on this month:
Reduce screen time in bed. Although it’s always a source of concern, I feel confident in saying I have a fairly healthy relationship with my phone, especially for someone who works in marketing. My average screen time is anywhere from 2:30 to 4:10 each week, numbers that always seem off-putting to me, but place me in a fairly typical, if not less-than-average, usage bucket. However, one of my major pitfalls is using my iPad in the bedroom to stream an episode of something before or while I go to bed. It’s usually a rerun of The West Wing or a light comedy. Ideally, I’d like to reduce this, if not end it entirely. Probably doing this anywhere from 5-7 nights/week right now. I’m concerned I’ll build a habit so strongly that it would be difficult to go to sleep without content, which is not a position I want to end up in.
Delay morning screen time. Though my phone is turned off at night, and stays in the kitchen, the nearby iPad is still one of the first things I reach for in the morning. Quick check of the texts, emails, and then my New York Times word games and a read of the headlines. I’m not as concerned with those activities as I am with delaying their onset. I’d love to give myself a few more moments of stillness and detachment in the morning before I plug myself in to the world. Even pushing this until after I make my coffee would feel appropriate. Simply, I could probably accomplish both of these tasks by just not bringing my iPad into the bedroom. However, I always enjoy some music (a french cafe playlist or morning R&B) in the morning, which means I turn to some device for streaming. But if I honor the third loop I’m trying to break, I might be able to avoid this.
Single track. I wish I could find it to share with you, but I read a story a few months back by a journalist who committed to spending a week doing only one thing at a time (I don’t think it was this one, but this is a good read as well). This meant everything from driving without listening to a podcast to watching a TV show/movie without a cellphone nearby to exercising without music. Do just one thing. It sounded like an interesting challenge, and once I tried it I realized how difficult this actually was. We’re always doing two things at once. Folding laundry and FaceTiming a friend. Having coffee and reading the newspaper. And when we’re doing both we’re savoring and/or retaining neither. In the spirit of being more present, more focused (there’s that word again), I’m being intentional about bringing my mind to just one task at a time. Funnily enough, I probably already faced my biggest challenge with this when I ran the LA Marathon without music (not by design though, my headphones just didn’t work when I arrived to the starting line). Did I notice anything? Yes - that I was present in a way I’ve never been with a run before, and I noticed a real difference in my performance because of that. I was more present to my body, my pace, my pain, my thoughts. Being forced into that focus made me a better runner. How about that?
Wishing you good luck as you try to break your loops too. Jump into the comments if you need some support!
The Fifty-Sixth Question
Are you more internally or externally motivated?
Is the answer consistent in all situations, or does it vary contextually? What are those contexts?
Has these source of your motivation changed over time? What do you attribute that to?
How do you call upon that motivation when you are in need of it?
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No song this week. Didn’t get a chance to add one yesterday and I’m on a time crunch this week. But add your journaling jam in the comments if you feel so inclined!