The Seventieth Question: The Resistance
Quitting something that isn't serving you is a powerful act, but what about those things we are avoiding those things in the first place?
I can’t believe we’re at 70 questions! We should be a bit further along than that, but I’ve taken weeks off here and there. Apologies if that has been a sore point for you, but that’s key to my ability to have made it this far with this endeavor. Working on a weekly content series like this ends up feeling like homework if I’m not in the right headspace, even if it’s something I enjoy! So I’d prefer to let you down once every few months than for good. (And if you’re someone who experienced the same with a previous project but developed a mindset to break that, let me know how!).
I took the past few weeks off as my Sundays were a bit busy, and I didn’t have the weekend to prepare our questions. Let me tell you a bit about what I was doing last Sunday instead of emailing you all.
On August 18, I ran the America’s Finest City Half Marathon in San Diego.
I don’t share this to solicit your kudos (though I’ll always take flowers if they’re being given). I'm sharing this because I want to let you know I ran one of the worst races of my life…and I’m proud of myself for pulling that off! Yeah, I did terribly, and I’m thrilled about it.
See, in running, we often talk about the importance of running your own race. This mindset could be applied universally, but in running, we say it to mean that the only person on the course you should worry about is yourself. We’re amateur athletes, and 99% of us are just racing to finish, not to win. Someone else’s speed isn’t our concern, only our own.
That’s an important sentiment to remember: focus on yourself. But I think there’s a second part we don’t talk about enough: Run your race, run today’s race.
Going to bed on Saturday night, I worked out a course plan to try to run the course with a finish time of 1:55:00 - 1:58:00. My speed was picking up lately, and I felt good about the prospect of getting my time back under two hours. Then I woke up. My body just wasn’t right. A pinch in my shoulder. An ankle that wouldn’t defrost. I knew that time wasn’t in my body that morning.
Would I be a buster and not show up to the starting line? Absolutely not; I could still run. There wasn’t an injury. But as soon as I started the course, I knew a sub-two-hour half-marathon was not in the cards for me. With that, I was faced with a choice. I could keep pushing and try to fight through it or embrace the signals my body was giving me, or I could turn off pace notifications in Strava, tune out of mile markers, and enjoy a leisurely run along San Diego’s shore and through Balboa Park.
I think it’s pretty obvious which I chose.
The outcome? A time consistent with what I was running races at last year. A signal that, had I been able to pace to plan, I’d have been able to achieve it. And now I can code the race as a positive experience and memory, not one of disappointment. What a gift that is!
I share this in hopes that you will also remember to run today’s race. However, that may be realized for you. Being honest about your to-do list at work, taking chores off your list you just won’t do, and putting down the book you’ll never finish. It’s not failure; it’s not giving up; it’s embracing yourself where you’re at.
Anyway, I’ve kept you around long enough. You don’t need a lengthy response to Question #69 from me at this point, so let’s hit Question #70.
The Seventieth Question
Some might read the above and consider it quitting (I don’t, and I hope you don’t either). Quitting is abandoning once we have embarked upon or decided to do something. But what about those things we never begin in the first place?
What are you resisting right now?
Starting something? Finishing something? Calling someone? Resistance can manifest in reaction to many things:
Can you pinpoint the origin of this resistance?
What beliefs do you have about doing this thing that might be holding you back?
How would your life be different if you never did this thing? If you did it right now?
Can you call upon a resource or a person to help you do this?
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See you next week.