Answering the Question: Checking Off My Wishlist
I know what I'm getting myself for Chanukkah this year
Brainstorm the gift(s) you can give yourself before the end of the year.
As I’m about to write to you with my reflections on the gift(s) I should give myself before year’s end, I’m realizing that the place from which I am writing this note is a gift I have waited quite a long time to give myself: a room at The Roundhouse in Beacon, NY.
Exactly when I learned about The Roundhouse is a mystery lost to time (though I’m pretty sure it was from some Instagram influencer), but it has been a hotel on my “Must Stay” list for years. The minimalist design is incredibly soothing and the views of the river from my bed are such a calming thing to wake-up to. I wish I had one of their rooms with a round soaker tub that sits at the foot of the bed, in front of full-panel windows, but I’m pretty sure that’s reserved for this weekend’s bride and groom. In this case, I’ll allow it.
While I’d wanted to come here for a while, it was just something I never tried at all to make happen. It was years of ogling their Instagram, then the pandemic, then the move to LA…then I thought it just might never happen. And I was fine with that.
But then my friend told me she and her fiancé were looking at wedding venues in the Hudson Valley. I told her that was perfect, and no matter where they chose I’d stay at The Roundhouse, finally having the chance to check this property out. She told me that’s exactly where they were likely to sign a contract.
Kismet.
Sometimes the universe just wants these things to happen for you.
But most times you need to make these things happen for yourself. Thus, this week’s prompt.
Looking at my list
In all, my list came together with about nine different items on it. Whether or not this was because last week’s prompt brought these issues top of mind for me, one thing I noticed right away was that many of these prompts were driven by the negative. By that I mean my “gifts” were really attempts to resolve the negatives I had surfaced last week. Dietary and lifestyle hacks to change my body. Routines to overcome resistance to behavioral shifts I thought I wanted to make.
But those aren’t gifts, those are feeding the negative self-talk I’m trying to unlearn. By focusing on them here, I was not healing them, I was giving them more power. If I took these gifts, one of two things would happen. I would either prove this was a part of me that needed solving, or set myself up for further despair when I took this gift but failed to achieve the desired outcome, thus reinforcing a belief that this is a bad, unfixable part of me.
So instead, I culled the list down to the 2-3 items that were much more affirming, and all of which worked towards a common goal: creativity. And from that, I figured out the gift I want to give myself.
An artist’s retreat.
The length? I don’t know. The agenda? I don’t know. The place? I don’t know. The intention? That I’ve got: to create and to play. To allow myself uninterrupted time to tap into my internal artist and see the projects that person creates.
I’ll keep you updated on what that looks like as it takes shape, in case that’s something that calls to you as well. And do let me know the gifts on your list, too!
Something for the Weekend
I’m a huge tennis fan, and while I’m deeply disappointed we won’t get our All-American final at the US Open Saturday night, it has been a delight to see Coco Gauff come into her power this summer as the champion. After back-to-back wins at two major tournaments, she made her second major semi-final and is now one win away from winning her first major. I actually had the chance to catch her in France last summer for the French Open, where she beat Martina Trevisan to make her first-ever major final.
Coco’s triumph (regardless of Saturday’s outcome), capstones a powerful summer for black women in the spotlight, from sports to arts to politics. A piece in The 19th this morning perfectly weaves together the accomplishments of women like Beyoncé, Coco, Vice President Harris, and the everyday black women who made this summer what it was. Worth the read.
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See you Sunday!
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